It’s still coo-coo bananapants to me that I graduated from Georgetown last week. Sixteen-year-old Sarah probably would’ve wet herself and choked on a Trader Joe’s potsticker simultaneously if someone told her that would be a thing. Seriously. Georgetown was my dream school since I was 8 years old and the only college I applied to when the average number for my high school was 15-20 (the college advising team full-on wanted to throttle me). And yet! Even with Georgetown being my goal for almost a decade, I had zippo idea how significant my time on the Hilltop would be. 

I won’t go into all that occurred over the last five years here (I’m trying to be concise 😅!), but if you’re interested, I’ve written about some of the major shifts like my deliverance from 15 years of pornography addiction (“You Can Be Free”), the end of my period of political idolatry/being an intellectual bully (“Toilet Paper Advice” & “A Nail That Sticks Out”), and my experience wrestling with vanity-induced chronic sickness and suicidality (“A One-Two Punch Lights Out,” “A Day of Drought,” & “Spit That Out Right Now!”) on here before!

I pray those more seismic shifts are an encouragement to you that if God can turn around a whole mess like me, He who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, more than we ask or think, can do the same for you—easy peasy. 

That being said! I am still VERY much a work in progress. 2 Corinthians 3:18 says that, in Christ, we are being transformed from one degree of glory to the next, and as long as God still has me on this side of eternity, that transformation isn’t complete yet. 

While the shifts might be subtler, they’re no less significant, and this last year at Georgetown was full of little lessons with truly life-altering consequences, five of which I’d like to share today in the hopes that what it took me twenty-three years to learn might be helpful for you presently 🙂

They are as follows:

1. Words Create Reality 

Proverbs 18:21 says, “Life and death are in power of the tongue,” and I feel like this year, I really came to see what it is to speak life (or death) to somebody. I actually had some of the hardest conversations I’ve had in my life over the last nine months and got to experience first-hand how words can be used as weapons and/or given as gifts, both of which have (I think) taught me to be much more linguistically conscientious. As an external processor and consummate word-vomiter, this was a significant and much-needed shift, though I admittedly did go through a season where I basically went mute for fear of speaking death. Helpfully, though! I also started going to Biblical Counseling (talk about speaking LIFE) and one of the sessions critically clarified for me that when Jesus says in Matthew 12:36, “I tell you, for every careless word a man speaks, he will give an account for it on the Day of Judgment,” the key word there is careless. Jesus didn’t say for every misunderstood word we will give an account on the D of J. Even He was misunderstood–frequently. But what Jesus never was was careless in His speech. I mean, He not only spoke the universe into existence with the Godhead in the beginning (Genesis 1) but He IS “The Word made flesh” (John 1:14) who became incarnate in order that all who believe in Him will never die but LIVE. If ever there was a reality-creating, care-filled Word, it’d be Him. Well-worth considering and emulating, in my opinion.

2. It Is More Blessed to Give Than To Receive

2 Corinthians 12:15 says, “I would gladly spend and be expended for your souls,” and this year, having that mindset was my goal. I actually put that verse on my door as a daily reminder of what kind of person I wanted to be, someone who gave their time, money, resources, attention, etc. generously (I’m naturally very possessive and stingy) and Holy cannoli! do I feel like I was hit with a dump truck of blessings in the form of getting to rejoice in seeing what I gave be multiplied and magnified in so many incredible ways 🙂 Matthew 6:21 says, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also,” and I cannot recommend enough extending your treasure, and thereby extending your heart to more and more people/communities.

3. Love Is Key

1 Corinthians 13:2 says, “If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.” This year was very weird in that the combo of putting off required intro courses and taking a year off meant I had a number of classes where the majority of students were freshmen. I 100% felt like a dinosaur, but my old-woman-ness also came with a fair bit of pride and self-conceit–like “I obviously know SO much more than these kiddos–some of them aren’t even eighteen! They’re collegiate neophytes while I can fathom all the paper-writing mysteries.” Early on, though, the Lord really convicted me that my extra years and “knowledge,” apart from Him, meant nothing because as Johnny Cash says, “What have I become, my dearest friend? Everyone I know goes away in the end. And you can have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt.” Five extra years or fifty wouldn’t change the fact that I’ve got nothing–nothing–nothing to offer anyone, apart from Jesus, that isn’t going to turn to dirt in the end. 1 Corinthians 13:13 says, “Three things will last forever: faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love,” and 1 John 4:8 says, “God IS love.” and what this year made very clear to me was that whatever worldly advantages I possess, the only thing I really have to offer anybody is knowledge of Jesus. 

4. Pray Without Ceasing

Romans 12:12 says, “Rejoice in hope, be steadfast in trial, be constant in prayer.” I feel like I really learned how to talk to God this year. Whether in praying Psalm 55:22 whenever I wore heels or would rollerskate, asking God please not to let me fall on my face, or praying, praying, praying Psalm 119: 97-100 that He would make my papers make sense when I was pretty sure I couldn’t even English, bringing small or big things to the One in whom we live and move and have our being changed everything for me. And it wasn’t even just that prayer “worked” (I did not break my face/all papers turned out okay)–it was the fact that Matthew 4:4 says, “Man does not live on bread alone but on every word that proceeds from the mouth of God” and Hebrews 7:25 says, “Jesus LIVES to make intercession for us” which just one day clicked in my head, like, I am ALWAYS on Jesus’ lips and always on His mind, so why should He not be on mine? That realization opened up whole new kinds of prayer like thanksgiving and confession because I just wanted fellowship with Him, and it not only deepened my understanding of God, but also my understanding of me. Like, I am so finite, fallible, and weak, and Jesus isn’t kidding when he says in John 15:5, “Apart from Me, you can do nothing,” but He also isn’t kidding when He says, right after that in John 15:7, “If you abide in Me and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it WILL be done for you.” Prayer is a gamechanger, friends. I recommend it. 

5. Jesus Is All You Need

Over the last five years, God has put His hand on a lot of things I would have once felt (even said) were essential for my existence, or at least my flourishing. He claimed my sexuality, my health, and my career ambitions between sophomore and junior year, but this last year, He claimed the hardest thing for me to cede: my relationships with people extremely important to me. I’ve always been possessive of people. I’m like the Nemo seagulls “MINE MINE MINE!” when it comes to those I love. I do not do well when circumstances require they be partially or wholly given up. And this year, two relational changes I fully did not expect broke my heart–just shattered it. The first had me weeping at 1am on the Darnell steps. The second had me blowing through a box of tissues in the front row of my Religion and Science class. After the first, Jesus set me back on my feet with the knowledge that while people and my relationships with them might change/fade, as Hebrews 13:8 says, “Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” He’ll never let me down. And after the second, it was the realization that if I want any hope in this life or the next, relational or otherwise, He’s the only game in town. Proof text is John 6:67-68 where Jesus’ listeners are peeling off like paint from a barn door because they don’t like what He’s saying, and He turns and asks the twelve, “You don’t want to go away too, do you?” and Simon Peter answers, “Where else shall we go, Lord? You have the words of eternal life.” This last year of uni, Jesus finally asked me, “if I take it all—not just your sexuality, health, ambitions, etc. but the relationships you hold most dear—am I enough? Will you be content if I am all you get?” Answer (after copious tears): yes. He really is, and while it was a bumpy road to get there, I’m so grateful I know the answer to that. If you don’t, I pray you consider what answer you would give? What are the things you need—aside from or not even including eternal life—to be content? If you were to lose them, what would your response be? Just something to think about. 

Alright! So much for being concise!

In summary, five lessons learned this year:

1. Words Create Reality
2. It Is More Blessed to Give Than to Receive
3. Love Is Key
4. Pray Without Ceasing
5. Jesus Is All You Need

My time on the Hilltop was a ride. In the last five years, I’ve become someone high-school Sarah would not recognize. Through it all, God has been so exceedingly kind–more than I deserve for sure–and I 100% relate to what John Newton, the writer of the hymn “Amazing Grace”, once said, “I am not what I ought to be. I am not what I want to be. I am not what I hope to be, but I am not what I used to be. By the grace of God I am what I am.” Amen. 

Next up for me is a residential fellowship with the John Jay Institute in Philly (very, very excited about this), studying for the LSAT, and finishing a major writing project 🙂

Penultimately, I do have three prayer requests! 

Firstly, that I would love others in my life as Christ, especially my family and friends 🙂

Secondly, that I would use to the utmost the gifts God has given me for the good of others and for His glory. 

Thirdly, and most importantly–and I MEAN this with all sincerity–please, please pray that if I would even inch towards loving Jesus less, God would hit me with a semi-truck or tractor trailer (I am, after all, in Indiana for the summer) before I could move in that direction. I would 10/10 prefer to be an earthly pancake than separated from Jesus–my Savior, my King, my unfailing Friend–for a moment, let alone forever. Don’t want. Don’t like. Don’t recommend.

Finally, this post would be ridiculously long if I were to thank everyone who has poured into/helped me over the years (and I would doubtless forget to mention someone and feel absolutely crummy), but please know that I am so, so very grateful to you and that God who sees absolutely everything promises to bless those who bless those that are His (Genesis 12:3), and I can tell you, with total confidence, that God keeps His promises 🙂